Sleeping it off

Since last weekend’s excitement - marred by missing the last train home due to flight delays - this week has been a bit more challenging.

After taking steps to manage my wellbeing needs a few weeks ago it turned out that this was apparently too little too late. I’ve never been that great at honouring my self-care needs. Despite this, I do recognise that certain things are good for me, like: yoga, meditation, good diet, drinking plenty of water, etc. Where I struggle is getting the proportions right and, it seems, knowing when to just switch off altogether - and that isn’t a green flag for the doom scrolling that has been filling my very limited ‘down time’.

Gradually, over a period of several months, bad habits have crept in to displace the good. I justified poorer diet on the basis that  I was running so much that I could eat what I wanted. Sugar and caffeine increased along with stress at work, and good old H2O decreased significantly unless I was running. I’ve used the excuse of personal circumstances to let meditation fall by the wayside, and yoga has been reframed as essential maintenance for training rather than restorative in its own right.

So probably no surprise that come Monday morning, I literally came to a standstill. Not feeling down, particularly, other than negative self-talk about how useless I was for getting into this state again. More just numb - I realised my brain hasn’t been functioning well for weeks, if not months, with brain fog, memory issues and general running on autopilot.

After a brief trip into the office on Tuesday it wasn’t long before a frank conversation led to my return home, resigned to the fact that I had to rest, a lot.

As a result the remainder of the week has been spent largely sleeping. There have been moments of clarity in a gradually thinning fog of exhaustion as my brain does its thing and repairs itself. But mainly I have been practicing the art of self-love and allowing the doing nothing to ‘be ok’.

Like my previous blog on a similar theme, I’m not sharing this for feedback, but rather because I am charting all aspects of this challenge and what has happened is real life. I’ve bitten off a lot this year because I care, just not enough about the person that is essential to making it happen, me. And that is something I continue to work on privately, whilst recognising the many things I do have to be grateful for.

Apart from sleep I have done a bit of stone carving (a surprisingly mindful activity) and too much running. Mental and physical exhaustion go hand-in-hand and, even given what I’ve written above, after 4 days off I convinced myself that I was ok to run with intensity again. I wasn’t.

So it is with some sense of shame that I publicly admit to running almost the exact same (and same amount of time) as last week: 31.08 miles run over 2,713 feet of elevation, 6 at-home yoga workouts, 1 pre-hab workout, and 1 contrast therapy session (4 x 2 mins at 2 degrees followed by a full submersion then 10 mins sauna - starting cold, finishing hot).

@PancreaticCancerUK #PanCANawareness

Giant’s Causeway 20 Mile

This week saw me visit Northern Ireland for the first time and the second country of my challenge.  The trip didn’t start well after my chaotic packing and breaking the zip on my suitcase with 10 mins to spare before I had to leave. As for the country, I can’t say I was fully enamoured: I found the public transport wanting, prices high and folk in public generally quite cold and guarded but perhaps that is a legacy of The Troubles.

I had a similar experience many years ago in El Salvador - conflict’s footprint endures long after the guns are silenced - but as there, I discovered that underneath a hard exterior people are generally pretty lovely.

Alexandra, from Bushmills Town House was my first exposure to this warmer outlook. She was friendly and welcoming from the outset as she got me booked into a very quiet hostel. A bonus was that I had a room to myself rather than the shared dorm of snoring runners that I’d anticipated! Arriving late afternoon I was taken aback by how quiet the town of Bushmills was - and after offending (innocently) the cashier at the Co-Op and intruding (innocently) into the private flat of a Spanish family in the hostel I was glad to retreat to my room.

For my first full day I started out with a wonderful visit to Bushmills Distillery where the tour team (and our guide, Emma) couldn’t have been more lovely.  A late morning shot of their 12-year old vintage set me up nicely for a walk to Dunluce Castle, about 6 miles in total with a return loop via Portballintrae, taking in a section of the actual race route ‘al revés’. A late lunch of delicious dirty chips NI style with ‘black butter’ at The Bilberry Mill Cafe was just what I needed to fuel up for the race (plus some Guinness cake to take away). A good chunk of the evening was spent stretching out as I’d woken with a very tight right hip that only worsened with the walk.

Up bright and early I recorded the first part of my race vlog indoors as the wind was up and I (correctly) anticipated no change while I ran. Sammy, a 76-year old Bushmills born-and-bred local entertained me on the short taxi-ride to the start line at Carrick-a-Rede - the location of the famous rope bridge (that I didn’t have the chance to cross, thankfully). The wind was bitter - a forecast -9 degrees feels like temperature - but spirits were high and I was alarmed by the amount of bare leg on display; I’d seen the forecast and wasn’t taking any chances, leggings all the way thank you very much.

The race itself was tough - about 3,500 feet of climb plus numerous rockfalls to cross and an early calf-depth paddle in the cold North Atlantic to navigate a rocky outcrop. The wind up top was like nothing ever experienced on a run - both in strength and wind-chill - but the views were spectacular. I absolutely loved the race, not least my tourist detour for photos atop the Giant’s Causeway itself. It cost me time but I hadn’t come all this way to only see it with a sideways glance!

After deciding to change al fresco on the seafront in a gale (I didn’t lose anything to the wind) I returned to the finish line for a quick medal photo before strutting in my oh-so-sexy white socks and sliders around the town to find a decent spot for food. Follow Coast came out on top with the best version of scrambled eggs I’ve probably ever had. Returning to the drama of public transport I had to resort to Tourist Information for guidance to find the feckin bus stop.

A lovely celebration dinner at Bushmills Townhouse and I made sure to be more careful with my packing, even managing to securely stash away my bottle of Bushmills ‘Caribbean Rum’ whisky.

I was up early the next day to get soaked waiting for the infrequent bus to Coleraine, a  50 minute wait for the train, and a conductor who helpfully pointed out that I’d spent £5.50 too much on my ticket but couldn’t do anything about it. Obviously my thought was ‘Why does the machine not sell you the only ticket available on a Sunday then!’ Back in Belfast, I did St George’s Market twice, the city bus tour, and walked around the Cathedral Quarter. Sick of a) being on my own and b) getting repeatedly soaked in April showers, I took refuge in various bars for food and libation until it was time to return to the airport. Needless to say, with my Sowerby Bridge Snails top on I made friends with 3 separate groups of Yorkshire folk and swung the lamp about how I conquered the weather gods on the Antrim Coast.

Plenty of coverage for Pancreatic Cancer UK this week as I travelled and ran in the branded gear.  And in figures: 30.81 miles run over 4,386 feet of elevation, 3 at-home yoga workouts (with extra stretching for the hips, 1 pre-hab workout, and 0 contrast therapy sessions (not counting the dip in the North Atlantic!)

https://fundraise.pancreaticcancer.org.uk/fundraisers/olifax

#PanCANawareness

Eyes on the Prize

Down South Time

Sun and Run Therapy

March Challenge - Alnwick Castle Half

Alnwick Castle Half Marathon Review

A ‘Spring’ Anatomy Lesson

Presentation Night

New Trainers

Valentines' 2026

Rombalds Running Review

February Challenge - Rombalds Stride

This week’s training and race felt hard, probably a reflection of the fact that I’m not getting enough quality sleep.  Nonetheless, with over 50 miles guess I haven’t done too badly.

The focus of the week was, of course, Saturday's race - and 2026 Challenge #2.  After the holiday, I was keen to get in some miles so I did a half marathon around the club run on Monday and slightly less on Wednesday.  Sensibly, I missed the Thursday hill reps and Friday track sessions.

Mentally I wasn't feeling great and had noticed my inner narrative was a bit doom and gloom about how the race was likely to be.  Probably feeling a bit sorry for myself because the rest of the participants from the Sowerby Bridge Snails RC had dropped out, my left hip flexor (oh yes, there's always a niggle) had been feeling very tight, and - let's face it - the weather had been particularly crap all week.

But, as I keep reminding myself, this challenge is not about me, it is about a far greater cause.  Which means every mental wobble and all the aches and pains are really insignificant when compared against what those with pancreatic cancer are facing.

As well as my own workplace experience, in a timely reminder of this, I finally met Alison on Friday.  She reached out to me after my media coverage in November and we've been in touch since then.  Alison lost her husband to pancreatic cancer about 14 months ago and her loss is a very real reminder of how devastating the disease is for both those with the diagnosis and their loved ones.

All told, I actually loved the race.  Physically it was very unpleasant, I fell a couple of times in the mud, and it was so foggy that there were no views.  But there is something about embracing the discomfort and doing something with others that is ultimately very uplifting.  Not to mention the delicious steak pie at the finish!

On the way home I also stopped off to get some much needed trainers as a reward.  The first replacements of the challenge.

This week’s stats come in at 53.32 miles run over 6,286 feet of elevation.  4 yoga / pilates sessions at home, 4 pre-hab workouts, and one contrast therapy session with 4 x 3:30 dips at 2 degrees with sauna inbetween, starting cold and finishing hot.

I am truly grateful for my amazing supporters.  It means a lot with so much still to come for me, and supporting the charity's work is helping make a difference to countless others.

Winter Warmer

I started the week with a very chilly training half marathon to a place called Castle Carr overlooking the valley by me.  The next day I was thankfully on a plane for warmer (if not particularly sunnier) climes for a few days away in The Canary Islands.

Whilst I did let my hair down and relax (including some time in the hotel spa), I also managed to get some training in and was surprised to find I ran more miles than last week.

However, the late nights and over-indulgence won’t have been a great boost to training so I’m hoping for some good sleep over the coming days in preparation for the 23-mile challenge #2 on Saturday.  I also ended January comfortably over my 120 mile/month target with 144.8 miles.

This week’s stats come in at 24.24 miles run over 1,726 feet of elevation.  2 yoga classes on holiday, 0 pre-hab workouts, and one not particularly focused contrast therapy session as part of a spa day at the hotel.

Support for the challenge continues to be fantastic and I must shout out to a beautiful, kind-hearted soul called Melissa for her £510 donation this week; words cannot express the gratitude for such a generous donation.  I’m now just £223 off reaching 50% of my target goal so it would be amazing to achieve that on the back of the second challenge.  Please help my sharing and drawing awareness to what I’m doing.

Race 1 Recovery

A fairly uneventful week after The Hebden.  Having pushed too much at the start of the week I lost my energy and developed a new niggle around my right Achilles tendon.  Paying the required attention to these factors with rest and appropriate exercises allowed me to tick off a new location for Parkrun on Saturday in Bramley.

On Thursday I was surprised to be notified of a full-page feature in The Halifax Courier, reproduced from the online article.  I also listened to a podcast by Macmillan Cancer Support featuring Alison Batchelor’s story and we hope to meet up early in February to explore more awareness-raising.

My fundraising page has now had 800 views and over 1/3 of my total has been raised, which is incredible with 11 months still to go.  Thanks again to all my supporters so far.

At the start of the year I set myself a Strava goal to run 120 miles/month and this week I reached that milestone for January.  I’ll probably get a few more miles in before the end of the month but I am off to Fuertaventura this coming week for my first overseas trip in 8 years and some much-needed winter sun!

So, compared to last week’s big numbers, this week has been a more achievable 23.78 miles run over 2,838 feet of elevation.  Along with this I completed 6 at-home yoga / Pilates sessions, 6 ‘Recover Athletics’ pre-hab workouts, and one contrast therapy session; today was 1 x 3:00 dip and then 3 x 3:30 dips at 2 degrees, finishing warm again.

January Challenge - The Hebden

After last week’s wobble, I’ve been nursing that IT-band issue in my right leg.  The pre-hab, yoga, contrast therapy, and carefully monitored running all paid off.  No pain during yesterday’s race!

Thanks to Harriet and the amazing team at Pancreatic Cancer UK, I received coverage in The Halifax Courier and had interviews with BBC Radio Leeds and ITV Calendar.  The BBC piece appeared online today but I’ve not heard anything about ITV as yet so maybe that didn’t make the cut!

Yesterday was the first official challenge of the year.  The Hebden - a great and popular race facilitated by the 12th Halifax Sea Scouts - is a gruelling race with around 4,500 feet of climb for the full ‘22’ mile course. 

The weather wasn’t too bad for the time of year, it was just very muddy and slippery underfoot, which made the going all the more effortful.  I managed to complete the course in 5:01 and was pretty close to passing out at the finish after starting from a much less energised position than I’d have hoped.

Wendy was very much in my thoughts all the way round.  My low energy and the aches and pains of a fell race a far cry from her own personal challenge.

I felt motivated to record some footage during the race and that can be found on my YouTube channel - just search for @vloggingpanther9233.

Stats-wise, this week a very passable 54.50 miles run over 6,850 feet of elevation.  That’s the farthest weekly distance since the start of July 2025.  This was supported with 5 at-home yoga sessions, 5 ‘Recover Athletics’ pre-hab workouts, and two contrast therapy sessions.  Today I managed 4 x 3:00 dips at 2 degrees, but for once I ‘finished warm’ as I find I don’t sleep well finishing cold.

Thanks to all who are following my progress and to everyone who has shown their support so far for me, Wendy and the charity.

Winter Training, Ice and Blues

A week out from the first race, I’ve faced a number of challenges since my last update.

Firstly, the weather led to all planned running club activities being cancelled for safety as our training patch has experienced a lot of ice (shout out to George, though, who completed one of the Pennine Way winter races - 46 miles across the Pennines from Edale to Hebden Bridge).  I must admit that with some personal matters on my mind, these cancellations allowed me to indulge some gloomy new year negativity - a slightly dangerous place to find myself with the year ahead to smash, even though my motivation for the challenge is strong.  Getting back on track becomes harder every day when habits get interrupted.

Nonetheless, this happens from time to time and I include the reflection to share the reality of my situation and the fact that I’m just like the majority who will ever read this.  Thankfully, I managed to summon up some appropriate emotional intelligence, was kind to myself and managed to sit with the feelings and let them pass.  Which, by Friday night, they had.

In terms of plans, I finally booked a Liverpool city break for some (almost) running free downtime to celebrate my 50th.  I also booked flights to Poland that will allow me to access a ‘Z’ parkrun and complete my first ‘alphabet’ (if you know, you know - if you don’t, get yourself along to parkrun and join in: running, walking, volunteering, or as I discovered at Halifax last weekend, jeffing).

While the weather outside was vile, I racked up 5 at-home yoga/pilates workouts, 2 strength workouts and a bit of stretching - including a focused ‘prehab’ for continued IT-band pain in my right leg.  To finish the weekend I encouraged my friend, Holly, to try out contrast therapy with me for the first time.  She did brilliantly and I managed four dips in the 2 degree bath: 2:30; 3:00; 3:00; 2:00 minutes respectively with a welcome sauna in-between for 10 mins or so each time.

And the running?  Well after an 11th hour cancellation of my planned parkrun (Bramley) on Saturday I managed to jump in with Jen and Nancy to attend a record attendance at Lister Park in Bradford - one of the few local destinations not overly affected by ice on the route.  Ice did, however, cut short a group early morning hilly run on Sunday.  Even the cows looked miserable trying to hide from the sleet next to a wall!  Somehow I managed to keep running and stay upright, bringing my weekly running total to 15.25 miles over 1,693 feet of elevation, my lowest figures since the first week of December.

My next update will report on January's race - The Hebden - and the first race in this series!

Ice Training

Christmas Week

Winter Solstice

I thought I would use the week that ended with the 2025 winter solstice to continue sharing more about my training journey for the 2026 challenge.  This was prompted by questions during an interview by the Pancreatic Cancer UK press team during the week.  The charity also sent me a lovely letter, purple beanie hat and medal for the November 100 Miles Challenge, thank you so much.

What a week it has been too.  The Old Kimboltonian’s Association have continued their fantastic support by agreeing to contribute £250 donation towards my costs.  As anticipated, the Greenland race also opened for registration so on Thursday, literally as the link went live, I got myself signed up.  The first 25% paid with the remainder due in August - it isn’t cheap but what an experience it will be and a great opportunity to promote PCUK from a spectacular location.

In my running this week I’ve covered 38.93 miles and 4,127 feet of elevation.  This was on two club runs, a club track intervals session, a new Parkrun (Horton Park), and a solo recce of a very muddy and foggy last 7 miles of The Hebden - my first race of 2026 - followed by a run home from Mytholmroyd to Halifax along the canal.

Supporting this activity, I have done four at-home yoga sessions, a festive jazz/funk dance class, and another contrast therapy session, this time starting/finishing cold with 5 baths in total (3 at 2 degrees with the longest 2.5 minutes).

Thanks to everyone who continues to support me and a special mention to Jan.  At the bridge featured in this week’s photo, she was reflecting on the winter solstice and we had a wonderful chat - 2 strangers connecting in nature and sharing our respective love for the rich history and nature of the Calder Valley.

Chilling off for Greenland

100 Miles for Pancreatic Cancer Awareness

World Pancreatic Cancer Day 20/11/25

Sowerby Bridge Snails Purple Awareness Run 19/11/25

Media Coverage 17/11/25

Build up to Purple Lights 16/11/25